menopause. If anyone had told me how unpredictable and unforgiving it was, I might have laughed – or maybe I would have cried!
My journey to this hormone roller coaster began quietly in my early 40s.
Fast forward ever, nearly 50, and let me tell you, it was a ride! Hot flashes, mood swings, sleepless nights – you gave it a name, I was there.
But along the way I learned a few things that made the entire experience a bit overwhelming.
From learning to defend for yourself, Really Having got it, I found a way to help me stay all (almost) in my sane.
So here’s my story. Complete what’s good, bad, and really sweaty. But before you dive in, quickly look at the menopause stages and set the scene.
- Perimenopause: The transitional stage leading to menopause, often lasting for several years. During this time, hormone levels fluctuate, leading to symptoms such as irregular periods, hot flashes, and mood changes.
- menopause: Officially marked for 12 consecutive months without a period. This stage signals the end of the menstrual cycle, which usually occurs around the age of 50, as the body’s hormone production changes dramatically.
- Postmenopausal: During the postmenopausal period, symptoms may gradually ease in some women. However, long-term changes in health and hormonal balance, such as bone density and heart health, may be recognized.
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Recognizes the onset of the perimenopause period
The early signs were subtle, but they certainly caught my attention. My menstrual cycle was always reliable, so I was able to set a calendar.
At first, my period began sneaking up a bit early and arrived every 3 weeks rather than four. It’s not exactly convenient, but it’s easy to manage. I decided to crank every two weeks.
Yes, two weeks! Imagine that the next period will barely overcome one period before knocking on the door.
It was exhausting, inconvenient and honestly unfair. I felt like I was caught up in a cruel cycle of lottery tickets.
And this unpredictability didn’t go away anytime soon. For about two years I was caught up in this unsteady rhythm, and had a cycle of arriving two to four weeks away.
For a few months, I am at the mercy of a short two-week cycle. Other months, I get a small break during the four weeks. But the sense of normality was outside the window and I didn’t know what to expect.
Then, just as it was suddenly shortened, my cycle began to grow into a long, mysterious absence. It’s been two months, sometimes even longer, and I’m constantly guessing.
It seemed my body had given up on all sorts of regular plans and I was just on the ride!
This wasn’t a small change. It was an opening act to a whole new stage of life, and I have very clear that I am heading towards the perimenopause, as I have symptoms.
If my cycle was unpredictable, as it turns out, everything else was! And this was just the beginning.
Address and deal with symptoms of Pommimenopuse
Menopause periods lead to more than unpredictable periods. Every part of your life is dragged into experience and just a new surprise appears when you think you understand it.
Here’s how I tried to manage each of these lovely “gifts” menopause periods:
Sleep confusion and insomnia
Insomnia quickly became one of the biggest challenges I faced. Sleeping after 5am has become a luxury. I rarely enjoyed it.
Most nights I was lucky to have rubbed together for four hours, but even that sleep was interrupted by constant awakening. Sometimes I would lay there for over an hour in the middle of the night, wondering if I knew how one night’s sleep felt again.
To say the least, trying to get through everyday life with broken and minimal sleep was a struggle. It felt like my body was working against me, and it made everything a little difficult and definitely tired.
Related Article: The relationship between quality sleep and weight loss
Hot water and night sweats
What began as mild night sweats quickly escalated to the complete hot flashes that hit all the time of the day.
I threw my blanket at night and then incited myself during the day to try and reassure myself.
And “hotting” doesn’t fully grasp reality. It felt like the core of the sun was spreading from deep inside me.
This wasn’t just hot due to warm rooms and weather. This was a violent internal heat that seemed to be out of sync with what was happening inside me.
At their peak, I was getting 3-4 flashes per hour, but the intensity was enough to make me panic and panic.
These flashes were constantly hit, which made me feel like the thermostat on my body was broken and I turned the heat on and off without warning.
They were relentless and became something I had to consider my day. An estimated one-third of women experience more than 10 hot flashes per day, and I was definitely one of them. It’s not the club I was excited to join!
Take a peek at my peak hot spring season! That’s me. I’m happy to cool down while my poor husband is bundled up like he’s wandering around the Arctic.
When your body is moving its own personal heat wave, everyone else just has to adapt! You’d think he’s in the middle of a cold snap, but no, that’s what happens when I set the thermostat to “survive the hot flashes.” Sorry, baby!
Related Article: Chilis Sleep’s Ooler Sleep System Review: Goodbye, Night Sweat!
Mood and mental health changes
Irritability became my new partner and appeared at the most inconvenient times. I always snap to something that doesn’t bother me.
motivation? It’s gone. I felt characteristically lazy. That in itself was frustrating. Like I lost the usual spark.
But the real kicker is a mental mist that seems to roll and calm, making it almost impossible to keep focused or even remember something simple.
I tracked the conversation and found myself standing in the room.
And, as if that wasn’t enough, anxiety creeps up out of nowhere, adding another layer of anxiety.
All of this made me feel strangely separate from myself and everything around me.
Physical changes
The mental and emotional roller coaster was difficult enough, but then physical changes began to pile up.
My hair was falling off – more than normal stray chains. Every time I brushed or washed it, a small chunk seemed to remain, as if my hair was quietly staging its own escape.
It was amazing, seeing my hair look thin and thin in front of me, and each stray chain felt like a reminder that my body was changing in a way I couldn’t control.
And then I gained weight. This wasn’t the weight I could shake off with a few tweaks here and there. It was stubborn, unmotivated and resistant to all my best efforts.
As a creator of Health and Wellness content, this was particularly difficult to swallow. I know science, everyday life, food, and the strategies to work normally.
However, this time there was no dent. I stuck to healthy habits and did everything “right” but my body seemed to be on its own path.
It was more than disappointment. It made me feel that my own expertise and hard work were helpless.
Related Article: Navigating Menopause and Weight Increase: Weight Management Strategies for Women
Heart movement pit
Of all symptoms, heart movement pit was by far the most unsettling. One moment, everything will go well, and the next time, my mind suddenly started racing.
Every time it happens, I wonder if this is a sign of something serious and feel a surge in anxiety.
Unpredictability only made it worse. These episodes were random hits, adding an extra layer of anxiety over everything else I already dealt with.
It was hard to ignore, especially when my own mind seemed to work against my peace.
And a brief disclaimer: While heart motion pits can become a normal part of the perimenopause period, potential issues with your heart should never be ignored.
It is always wise to check in with your doctor to make sure that nothing else is causing any issues. I tried to be tested for myself just for peace of mind. It’s a stage worth taking.
defend yourself
If there is one lesson I have taken away from this experience, it is the power of self-advocacy.
It’s easy to feel lost without clear guidance, as per-menopausal symptoms can feel unpredictable and altered. Doctors often diagnose perimenopause based solely on symptoms, which helps, but I wanted more than an educated guess.
I needed a clear and definitive answer, so I requested a hormone test to make sure I was suspected. Taking that extra step gave me the clarity I needed, and helped me feel more rooted by understanding what was going on in my body.
Finding the right doctor proved equally important. It required someone who took my concerns seriously, as well as understood the true, daily impact of menopause.
It’s something else you need to know about menopause from the textbook and how it actually affects someone else’s life.
We created a world of difference through lifestyle changes and hormonal therapy for hormone shifts, symptoms, and all the potential approaches to managing them.
It was essential to find someone who was willing to work with me and who didn’t treat my experience as just a checklist of symptoms.
He also made self-education a priority. I read articles, listened to podcasts, and talked to other women who were experiencing it.
Hearing about their experiences was both comforting and eye-opening, and gave me insights and practical advice beyond typical medical information.
This network of knowledge and support felt empowered as if my personal toolkit had my own personal toolkit to resort to with every new challenge.
Self-advocacy is more than just a voice. It’s about gaining information, support and resources to navigate menopause in a way that’s right and meaningful to you.
Choosing Hormonal Replacement Therapy (HRT)
When it comes to managing my peri-menopause symptoms, hormone replacement therapy (HRT) quickly emerged as a powerful option.
This decision was not something I underestimated. I knew there were potential risks and benefits to consider, so I wanted to make sure it was the right choice for me.
Fortunately, I had a doctor who was very knowledgeable about the nuances of hormone therapy. They went through to me through the hormones of estrogen, progesterone, and even testosterone, and even how these function in the body.
This comprehensive approach made all the difference, and having a doctor who understood these complexities was key to feeling confident in my decisions.
The fact that I had no family history of breast cancer also influenced my choices. Without that additional risk factor, HRT felt like a safe and viable option for me. If he had a family history of breast cancer, he would not have considered it. However, this risk came off the table, so I was able to rate HRT seriously and with peace of mind.
When I started HRT, the impact was profound. My daily life, especially the symptoms that were blocking intense hot flashes, ruthless insomnia and mental mists, have become easier.
When estrogen, progesterone and testosterone all work together, I finally got a sense of balance back. It wasn’t just about managing symptoms. It was about regaining happiness and feeling like I was once again.
After about six months with HRT, I decided to check if I could stop treatment while managing my symptoms.
My doctor explained that unlike other medications, HRT could start and stop without tapering, so I could simply take a break and see how my body responded.
I handled the therapy well and provided a real relief, but I didn’t like to maintain my medication unless it felt really necessary and had a noticeable impact on my health and well-being.
Over approximately 18 months, HRT was stopped every 4-6 months to test whether symptoms could be maintained without it.
If symptoms returned, I would resume treatment, but every pause gave me a little more hope that I might eventually be able to manage without it.
Finally, after a few rounds of attempts, I was able to stop forever without my symptoms returning. It is a big victory and a big milestone in your journey around menopause.
Choosing HRT was a carefully considered choice made possible by a doctor who truly understood how these hormones worked in harmony and supported by research I could trust.
It gave me the support I needed in some of the toughest stages of the perimenopause.
Transition from menopause to postmenopausal
There are official markers for reaching menopause. There are no periods for 12 consecutive times. It’s not 11 months and 3 weeks. It’s not “soon.” No, it must be a solid year and there are no surprise visits.
Only after this year of stretching can it be considered postmenopausal, but for example, it can feel like the longest countdown of your life.
One long time stands out in particular, but you can still shake your head. I’ve been in 11 months, 11 months!
I was very close to the finish line and was able to actually enjoy the victory. And like that, my body decided to throw the final curveball. Times have come, and at the last moment we creep up and resume our clocks.
Another 12 months. I remember thinking, “Are you kidding?” As I approached the end of the marathon, I felt like I was being told, “Sorry, I need to start over!”
Finally, at age 49, I became that elusive 12 month mark. There were no grand celebrations or medals, but it was a monumental moment for me. I finally felt like I was officially post-menopausal and crossed the finish line I had been chasing for years.
With that chapter finally closed, I was able to move on to this new phase. I’m grateful that I’m putting together the countdown and ready for what comes next.
Reflections on the journey of menopause
Although all women’s experiences of menopause are different, there are real strengths in sharing our stories and learning from each other.
For me, navigating this transition meant finding a doctor who defended himself, educated himself about options like HRT, and who really understood the challenges of menopause and menopause.
Each step helped me to face this phase a little easier and more self-confidence.
If you are just beginning to notice symptoms or are already deeper in the process, remember. You’re not the only one.
There is a wealth of resources, a knowledgeable professional, and a community of women where you are.
Seeking information and support can make a real difference. No matter where you are on this journey, there is always help and understanding one step away.